Happened to read a most disturbing piece reported in BBC.
Women ‘get blame for being raped’
Fewer than 6% of reported rapes result in a conviction
A third of people believe a woman is partially or completely responsible for being raped if she has behaved flirtatiously, a survey suggests.)
The Amnesty International poll of 1,000 people also found over 25% believe she is at least partly to blame if she has worn revealing clothing or been drunk.
Amnesty says the “shocking” findings show government policies are failing.
And the director of public prosecutions told the BBC the report “highlights some areas of real concern”.
Ken Macdonald QC, who is in charge of prosecutions in England and Wales, spoke to BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour.
“The idea that a third of our people think that if a woman flirts she has only herself to blame if she is raped is, I think, quite shocking,” he said.
“These are jury trials. The jury is the community in the courtroom and it is reasonable to suppose the jury brings into the courtroom a lot of the attitudes we have been reading about.”
Nothing can be traced back to male unreasonability when it comes to battle between the sexes.
*A woman who decides to get a divorce,also gets a ‘whats she up to, there definitely is another guy’, while the man gets ‘Poor thing, he deserved better’.
*A twice divorced man is ‘plain unlucky ‘ while a woman is ‘such a tramp, no guy wants to live with her’
*When a man decides to be single he is ‘dedicated ‘ to his career and probably would get a promotion based on this, while a woman is ‘ambitious ‘as in a four letter word,or ‘cares for no one but herself’.
*A working mother is accused of ‘neglect’, while the father can get away with ‘pressures at work’ as reason to ignore kids.
* A mans success and growth in his career is attributed to ‘sheer dint of merit and hard work’, whilst a womans is simply ‘having slept around’.
*A man raising his voice on issues, even on the web is ‘passionate and forthright’ while a woman is ‘aggressive, argumentative and confrontational’
*A man hitting on a female is ‘just having fun’.. ‘harmless flirtation’. For a woman ofcourse she is ‘inviting to be raped’.
*While men can get away with wearing ‘nothing’ or close to it, and being considered ‘macho’, a woman is ‘cheap’ an ‘exhibitionist or ‘asking for rape’ if she so much as wears a tight tee and jeans.
Mind you this is not hyperbole.Only recently, a young Muslim girl from the Aligarh University was being rigged by the college authorities’ for setting a bad example’ since she had dared to attend classes in jeans and without the ‘dupatta’.
Justifications, excuses, explanations are aplenty and growing, as are the number of rape cases.One of the commonest explanations to rape in the west is as the BBC quoted above, and in India,it is the dress code,substantiated vociferously by the statistics of fewer rapes a couple of decades ago, when women , men aver, were conservatively attired.
The generation of our mothers and grandmothers appear not to have seen as many crimes against women. But how does one know for sure? It merely appears so since the shame associated was so tremendous that next to none got reported.Yet, if one were to pre-suppose the same,then the reasons are entirely different from what the guys choose to believe.
Consider this. Women did not venture out of their homes alone or in situations of seclusion. Women in careers were rare. Therefore opportunity for crimes of the kind was limited.Interaction of the sexes was within the precincts of homes, where other males were present. Social life was limited to marriages, restaurant hoppings, movies,basically family outings.
In other words, men couldnt quite corner women as easily. Opportunity being rare, crime was rarer. For rape, conditions have to be fortuitous, no matter how oxymoron-ish this appears.
Let us hypothecate solely for the purpose of a balanced asessment. Even if we do concede that dress code or flirtatiousness increased chances of rape, however absurd and ridiculous it sounds, then we have to admit simultaneously that male behaviour is open to animalistic traits which are triggered at the slightest provocation. So then here again, why blame the woman? It is the men who need to humanise themselves by curbing their wolfish mentality inherited from Neanderthal days, on the one hand, and simultaneously inculcating traits worthy of being ‘male’ in the right sense of the term.
A ‘no’ has to be taken as exactly that. No. After which it is rape, legally and technically.
Incidentally, this is the definition of rape in law “The crime of forcing another person to submit to sex acts, especially sexual intercourse.” ..In this light,therefore,clearly, whether it is a sex worker who expresses unwillingness or a wife, sexual intercourse without mutual consent is RAPE’!
It was appalling to hear people, men and women alike, on the recent rape of a 52 year old widow, by the scion of Kasliwal family, make comments such as ‘but what was she doing out so late’ or ‘ Is she is a sex worker? so how can it be rape?’.This after medical reports had proven a fractured arm and bruises all over her body.. Therefore not only does a woman get raped,but if she shows the gall to report it, then she is raped everyday, by either the media, the legal eagles or the common man. How can we blame a woman then that she’d rather choose to die a thousand deaths within her, simmer in low fire under the burnt ashes of outrage, pain, humiliation, helplessness,for the rest of her life.. than report the crime.
Given the above scenario, if she dares to fight for justice, is it fair we disregard then the courage , grit and steadfastness exhibited, and instead whip her with shameful innuendoes? All over the world, sexual violence is on the increase, and guilty rarely brought to book. If law needs witnesses, this is one crime that rarely has corroboration. Yet, women are believed to ‘invite’ rape??
Is it worth considering that perhaps men are ‘angry’ at women for having taken over their bastion as providers? Far fetched? Women in their newly found economic independence are self sufficient and content in their single lives. Does this aggravate the feeling of ‘redundancy’ in a male, now that he has been substituted with other progressive interests? So does this lead to Rape? Violence in its most depraved manifestation!!
The question is not limited in scope merely to how a man perceives a woman. But more importantly in what manner he chooses to view himself, vis-a vis his own self-esteem, at the risk of sounding neoplasmic.
A more recent addition to the hydra headed is ‘date rape’.One cannot ignore the almost rampant incidents of ‘date rape’. So here is a man, well ensconced in his gentleman attire, who cooes and wooes, wines and dines, all the while cloaking his predatorial intentions beneath social graces, in wait for the perfect moment, to strike at the clueless female.A perfect reflection of the serpignous psyche of the modern male.
What precedes the thought? Read on. This is a comment received recently on my blog..
“Well not always but many times gals ask for it,not directly but indirectly.gals take a lot of time before sleeping with a man.If ultimate aim is physcal pleasure then why do they waste so much time.Don’t tell that gals are all innocent,especially in metros and elsewhere,at least they give some sort of sign of their mean character then only rape happens.
There are good girls also and there are reasons other than this for rape. In that case guilty must be punished.If a girl behaves properly there is very less chance that she will be raped.Accidental rape may happen but in most of the cases rapist knew the victims personally.”
Cultured? sure..of the bacterial variety. In need of urgent pathological treatment for deconditioning from genetically engineered code of his club-in-hand-caveman days.
One is not attempting to suggest that all males need be viewed as ‘potential rapists’. For every one of the above category , there may be half a dozen who are as incensed , if not more by atrocities on women and would probably contribute to the nth degree to rectify the situation.
Surely the reasonable males will realise that categorising is essential at times. However blanket statements and generalisations are dangerous, and therefore intentionally avoided. Nevertheless going by the alarming rise in these untoward incidences, one cannot close ones eyes to the growing trends of male perversion.
Steps for prevention or control, is meat for another post. Nevertheless, what one has attempted is to indict the question.
It would be so refreshing to witness our ‘stronger sex’ live up to that terminology in its ethical connotation and exhibit that strength in areas like say ‘protecting ‘ a woman from an assault, for a change, setting an example for their ilk.